I am 45 years old & have had a few years that would take most men down to their knees… Despite losing so much, I have decided to use this time to perfect myself as a man.”

I know lesser men, even myself started down this path of drinking themselves into oblivion or just give up on life.  Nope. Not me I am taking this crappy situation as a challenge – “alright life, you might have knocked me down… but you are not going to win.  I’m getting back up, and I’m going to kick your ass.”

If any of you are also going through a rough patch in life, hopefully, today’s post will help get you through it.  Here’s what you need to do:

Understand that shit happens it does.

Whether your wife cheated on you, your friend stole from you, you lost your job, you ate six whole boxes of cookies and had to be rushed to the hospital, you got a DUI, whatever… These things happen, and they happen to the best of us.  It might have been your fault, it might not have been your fault. It might have been something that has been building up for years or something that just happened yesterday. No matter how it happened, when it happened, or why it happened, it happened.  You know the expression, “there’s no use crying over spilt milk”?

What’s done, is done.

At this point in your “shit happens” plan, you’re probably thinking that you’re the only person in the world that is dealing with this.  You’re not alone. We all have baggage we’re dealing with – it’s how we deal with that baggage that makes us who we are.

VENT. Get it out of your system…

Call up your best friend and bitch.  Go to a bar with some buddies and talk through it.  Cry, scream, yell, drop as many “what the f***’s” as you need.  Like the Hoover Dam exploding in Super Man, let it flow. Go climb a mountain and yell profanities at the top of your lungs  Beat the crap out of a pillow. Run sprints until you’re blue in the face. Do whatever you need to do to vent, as long as it doesn’t put you in danger or the people around you.

Whenever I get angry or frustrated, I find that exercise is the best medicine.  In fact, I wish I could find a way to get angry more often because I can lift more weights, run faster and farther, and hit things harder whenever that happens.  If only they bottle this stuff up.

Understand that it’s not that bad…

Do you still have a pulse?

Good!  Things could be WAY worse.  Even if you lose “everything,” you’re alive, and you can still turn things around.  Please remember this: it is NEVER too late, and things are never as bad as they seem. Everybody has crappy days, but few of us have a real perspective on what a crappy day actually feels like.

I’ve been volunteering at some orphanages over the past few years, and it has been one of the most amazing and humbling experiences I’ve ever had.  Whenever I think I’m having a bad day, this place slaps me in the face with a massive dose of reality. If these children who can’t leave this compound can put on a smile and make the most out of life, you can too.

You woke up today.  Find a way to build on that.

Learn from it.

Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it.

Whatever happened yesterday is now officially history – LEARN FROM IT.

Lost Your Job? Start looking for a job you actually love or start your own company!  You have the unique opportunity to only pick something that makes you happy, while the rest of the world can’t get away from jobs that they probably don’t like.  You are lucky.

Your couple broke up with you? I guess they didn’t appreciate you for who you are, and now you can find somebody that is 100% right for you.  And if it was going to happen, better that it happened today than years from now!  Learn why it fell apart, and use that information to make your next relationship better.

Maybe you are the one who screwed up? Own up, take responsibility for your actions, and move on with your life.  Learn from your mistakes, and make sure it doesn’t happen again. I guarantee it’s a lesson you won’t need to learn twice.

Whatever happened, find a way to make it a learning opportunity.  If you’re smart – and you are, because you’re reading this post – you can use your Shit Happens moment to become a better person.

Put it behind you. It’s done.

You cannot change with what has happened, you can only change how you deal with it.  In Batman Begins, Bruce Wayne tells us, “it’s not who you are, but what you do that defines you.”

Amen, Dark Knight.

This is what you need to tell yourself: “This is the best f***ing thing that could have happened to me!”  Whether or not that’s true is 100% irrelevant. Perception becomes a reality, so your Shit Happens moment suddenly becomes a welcome change.  The NF reader previously referenced is looking at his misfortune as a challenge, and I find that to be extremely admirable. He was fired from a job that he probably hated, and is now going to pursue a career as an actor, something you dreamed about since he was a little kid.

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason.

I spent four years in a relationship pretending like I was happy before realizing how important it was for me to have someone that I care about around me at all times.  I gave up that life and made the decision to move on & create a new family.

Whatever has happened to you in your past, be it yesterday, a month ago, or a decade ago, it’s time to move on.  Whether it’s a lost job, broken relationship, tremendous weight gain, or anything else that is threatening to pull you down, know that it happened for a reason – it’s a step that had to happen so that you can eventually get to where you need to be.

It’s all in your mind – make that a positive thing.

Don’t dwell on it.

Sitting around feeling sorry for yourself and playing the “woe is me” card certainly might make you feel better temporarily, but it’s freaking useless in the long run.  Don’t be a victim, and get creative.

Pick up a new hobby.

Make a list of things you want to accomplish before you die. And start crossing them off.

Learn a new language.

Volunteer for anything, hospital, shelter to get some perspective.

Start working out & get in the best shape of your life.  

The more time you can spend improving yourself and staying busy, the less time you can spend on negative thinking that will destroy you.  As an added bonus, you get to transform into a better version of you. Once you start to see a positive change in yourself, you can build on that momentum and make positive changes in other aspects of your life as well.

Man Up.

This is the perfect opportunity for you to level up your life, so get it done.

If you just got dumped, dedicate yourself to becoming a better person, so it doesn’t happen again.  If you screwed up yesterday, learn from it and devote yourself to not making the same mistake today.  Whatever happened, learn from it, build on it, and move on with your life. Now hit the gym be the best you, you can be …

Chad Willis